Why

"Why" is a dangerous word. There is an episode of the innovative 1960s TV series "The Prisoner" (as I type this I realize a "re-make" has already been produced and is currently airing, but THAT is an entirely different subject) in which the title character goes up against the most fantastic, all-knowing computer on earth. He is able to destroy it by simply typing four strokes on the keyboard: W-H-Y-? The computer burns itself up just trying to fathom the question. The question "Why?" truly is overwhelming.

When two or more people disagree, the word "why" tends to become poisonous. If you ask me why I believe something, or why I do something the way that I do it, there is a good chance that rather than seeking to understand me, you have already decided that I am WRONG, and you are simply seeking to point out the error of my ways. When someone says, "I do not understand why you are doing it that way," there is a good chance that what they MEAN is, "I believe you are doing it wrong," -- when they probably truly do NOT understand.

In debate, "why" tends to be irrelevant or at least misdirected. King Lear's daughters ask him why he needs to be accompanied by one hundred knights, and his answer is, "Oh, reason not the need!" King Lear wants what he wants, and it is not his daughters' place to question him. The issue has nothing to do with WHY he wants the knights.

It is possible that we may gain valuable insights by asking WHY we feel the way we do, or why we do something precisely the way that we do it, but being unable to explain or justify our feelings or actions does not make them any less valid or proper. At the same time, offering a well-reasoned justification for our feelings or actions does not necessarily make them more valid or more proper than those with differing views.

In a less personal sense, if we ask why something happened the way it happened, or why something is the way it is, the answers will usually involve oversimplification and conjecture. Still, we may gain insight by considering the question.

There is a famous quote along the lines of "Some people look at things and ask why, I dream of things that never were and ask why not?" (This quote is generally attributed to Robert Kennedy, but he seems to have been quoting George Bernard Shaw ...) On the surface, this quote is uplifting -- though it can also be viewed as arrogant, involving the speaker's apparent claimed ability to correctly fathom the intricacies of why and why not. In truth, these questions can never be answered with certainty. Truth is complicated.