Values

Each of us has a probably-unique set of values. It is difficult and complicated to even define the concept of "values". Some use the term almost interchangeably with "morals", whereas for me it is more closely related to "priorities". An important part of my definition of "values" is that values are the criteria that each of us uses to distinguish "right" from "wrong". In trying to figure out how to define "values" I find that the World Wide Web contains many lists of values, often reduced to single words, such as "honesty" and "punctuality" and even "friendliness".

I cannot easily define "values", and I am certain that my internal definition does not match your internal definition, any more than my internal values match your internal values. Even if we agree that something like "friendliness" is a good thing, then there is the matter of defining "friendliness". I have a relative who I routinely accuse of gravitating toward "nosey busybodies" -- but I realize that the behavior that I define as being a "nosey busybody" could also be defined as being "friendly".

"Honesty" and "punctuality" suffer the same problems with variability in our definitions. We may embrace the value of honesty as a good thing, yet most of us place limits on our honesty, such as in situations in which we are trying to spare someone from hurt feelings (possibly because we sometimes place a higher priority on "kindness" than on "honesty"). The concept of "punctuality" varies widely between situations and cultures. In some situations and cultures, it is rude to be even a minute late, while in others it is rude to be a minute early.

At least in recent decades, Americans tend to frown on public nudity, and even pass laws against it. Other cultures do not necessarily view nudity as such a problem. In fact, there may be nothing intrinsically "wrong" about public nudity except that it violates long-held values -- though I am sure there are some who would argue that public nudity is "clearly, obviously" wrong, for a wide variety of reasons.

Perhaps the very best example of what I am trying to discuss is the placement of toilet paper on a bathroom roller. Some people do not care or notice whether the toilet paper comes over the top of the roll, or out from the bottom. For others, it is a major issue, and THEIR way is clearly "right". Some people acknowledge that their choice is simply from the way it was done at home as they were growing up, while others insist there is a logical reason why their way is preferable.

YOU may not see the position of toilet paper on the roller as an example of differing "values". If not, it is probably due to the fact that your definition of "values" is different than mine -- perhaps closer to the dictionary definition -- or that your values are different than mine.

Truth is complicated.